Money

I have such a love-hate relationship with money. I love it because, well, having it means having a lot of things I want. And I hate it because I need it to have anything I want. Since when did your standard of living depict your life happiness? I guess I haven't been around long enough or not as educated enough to answer that question. But similar to a Catholic priest's sermon, money is the root of all evil. I say this because I see money as the entity that separates groups of people within society, the 'haves' and 'have nots', the West Vancouverites and the East Vancouverites, the CEOs and the Third World citizens. While yes, some people work hard for their money, there are millions of people working SO hard yet don't earn half the amount I earn for sitting on my ass and writing this blog (not that I get paid for my amatuer blogging, I'm just blogging at work --I'm horrible I know).

Money has become a form of measurement. It measures how 'good' your life is, how many trips you can go on, how many things you can buy. It has become the focus of our life, to be successful for the most part means to make as much money to be 'financially comfortable'. It's so easy, as a resident of a Commonwealth nation, to talk about money and working hard, as we have more opportunities and possiblities for success available for us. We, I have been educated enough to be self-reflective and humbly grateful, to know the differences between my life and the lives of others not just in the Third Worlds but even in this country. I can sit here and preach while acting completely out of contradiction.

These past few weeks, I've indulged and penny pinched. Hitting the pub for wing night one day and lounging at the Keg patio with lobster and filet mignon another. Anyways, last weekend I went to the Philippine Festival in Richmond where my parents bought me lunch! haha always good. We went to this little Filipino Restaurant called Little Ongpin. Supposedly, the original Little Ongpin is in the Philippines and is known for it's amazing food. We ordered a lot of stuff most of which I don't remember but among them was Kare Kare, not pronounced as I initially thought (care-care) but like KAR-EH KAR-EH (it's in caps so you must say it with attitude). It is a yummy stew made with peanuts (my fave), green peas, bok choy, eggplant and whatever meat you want (usually pork?). We also tried this new style of Filipino rice that was mixed with Bagoong (shrimp paste pronounced as BAG-O-ONG) and green mango and pork. I'm usually up for new and exciting things so I liked these =) ... AND THEY WERE FREE (courtesy of my parents anyway). BTW, I stuck in a photo of chocolate frozen yogurt with strawberries in the beginning because they looked so freaking amazing.

Rain

Sometimes I feel like I have Seasonal Affective Disorder. Or maybe I'm just sick of the rain we constantly get in Vancouver. Although, it is nice to have a nice little cool break from the humidity and heat. With this dreary bleak and gray weather, however, comes contemplation, more than usual anyway. I watched the Notebook last night with a group of girls in the back seat of a nice BMW Suv (I'm not very technologically savy otherwise I'd know what type it was and I'm not brand labeling I'm just not familiar with very many cars that can pull down their back seats and become a makeshift bed!)

Anyways, minus the cranky biznatcher in the car next to us, it was such a cute but sad and definitely depressing movie! Cute, since Ryan Gosling and Rachel McAdams were so freaking cute (and so was James Marsden) and old couples growing up together and being in love is cute. Sad because well, dying and finding love is a sad thing. Depressing because well frankly, where the hell do you find guys who love you enough to come read to you at your nursing home everyday because you have dementia =( OR find love that lasts for that long... =(

Well atleast I'm done my man hating, rather, progressing quite nicely out of that little rut.This past week, guys have all the sudden become a beacon of light like a refreshing mint mojito on a warm sunny day (... maybe depends on the guys I hang out with? possibly?)

Anyways, on monday one of my cousins got laid off and we (my other cousin and I) decided to jetpack downtown. We headed to Carderos on Coal Harbour for nice relaxing drinks and appys, namely Fish Taco and BC Albacore Tuna (supposed to have been seared rare --but really I think they over cooked it). This was the first time I also had a shot of Patron! It is soo much smoother than regular tequila! I also had very many of their Mint on the Quay, so yummy! Then we sauntered over to Edgewater where the bartender made these yummy drinks that he claimed was his secret recipe-- they did include cranberry juice though! And after we had squandered most of our cash on hand, we bee-lined it to Coast Restaurant on Alberni since we craved their smoked salmon flatbread.

To my, mostly our, surprise my cousin's friend (one of the Chefs) decided to treat us to a nice four course meal including dessert! We started with oysters, which I had to try because he so graciously sent it over. Next came an assortment of sushi!! AND THEN the flat bread. It is THE BEST smoked salmon with arugula flat bread I've ever had in my entire life. And last was the crab cake, which I thought was also one of the top I've had as it was moist and fresh and yummy =) For dessert, I'm not quite sure I remember what it was after our two bottles of white, but I think it was banana bread-esque with a side of white chocolate for dipping! =) While, I understand these little things may not make up entirely for the shit done in the past, I thought it was a cute little gesture that signified a possibility of better things to come.

By the time our bill rolled around, my cousin was trashed (as I would have been if I had been laid off). I think it was the fact that her boyfriend picked her up with plastic bags and bottles of gatorade in his car that made my heart melt. These little gestures of sweeetness, or as Patti would say these acts of 'chivalry', caused the shift in my man-hating paradigm.

Now

I've been thinking about the events of the past month (since moving into my cousin's apartment I've practically been living alone cause of her crazy work schedule and I stupidly watched a scary movie this past week and haven't been able to sleep since). In trying to rationalize and be optimistic (and after watching Spice World) , I have come to an understanding that women have become quite independent as it is the 21st century. Women do what they want, say what they want and feel what they want as much as guys do. And while yes there have been differences, I like to think and encourage the idea that women have as much power if not more than men in certain situations.

With my personal life experiences as well as those who are close to me, I have been, to be completely honest, man-hating. This is neither an empowering or beneficial outlook on life. For me, it comes with a negative aura. I have been undergoing a process of change and development. Although I previously thought that the events of the past month challenged the 'evolution' of my perspective, I think that it's simply a matter for reconsideration. I needed to think of the recent (within the last fifty years) rights and independence women have gained and even now still fight to gain. It's so easy to take our independence for granted, well for me anyway. I was born into a society in which I virtually was free to do anything I wanted, as long as it remained a norm within my culture.

Moving to Canada at such a young age, I observed the roles of women and men within my ethnicity and then within my current nationality. The Philippines, being colonized by the Spaniards and the Portuguese in its early years was enforced with norms of tradition, hierarchy and some form of Christianity (mostly Catholicism). After being 'rescued' by the Americans from occupation by the Japanese during the World War II, the Philippines seems a bit more liberated, however is still quite entrenched in gender roles and social norms and customs. Like most things in life, this can be good or bad, it's all a matter of being balanced.

While I'm proud of my culture and the customs that come with it, there are still some aspects that I don't agree with. The subjugation of women, is one. Canada seems so much more liberated and neutral as far as patriarchy, and while I know that we exist in a patriarchical government/society/everything, I personaly have to believe and WANT to believe that women deserve equal rights. And so I am going to now try and enforce this belief on everything and everyone.

Now you might think that I am rambling like a fool (which I kind of am) but this is just my rationalization for events that happend and will happen. Boys are boys and girls are girls (there is plenty of room for those in between) but for my hetero-perspective, I expect nothing from boys and understand that actions are a consentual and joint effort.

Girls make their own decisions and choices. Just as some girls may decide to hook up with boys that are not their boyfriends, boys will decide to hook up with as many girls they want. And frankly, they are old enough for them to decide to screw up their life (lol). I don't pass judgement as I would never want any judgement, not that I would do anything similar but you know what I mean. Its another story though when friends say hurtful things because after a while it gets to be too much.

Anyways, my independence lately has led me to eating out lots because I can't cook, well I can but it's different when you have to BUY the ingredients you need to cook. So, I've just been walking over to Montana's (their service can be nice but a rather lengthy wait) for their Chicken Fajita (one order is good for atleast four people--- someone should have told me this when I ordered it), Nagano for their... I forgot what the roll was called but it was yummy! it had tuna tataki and smoked salmon on top and chopped scallop and a prawn inside, and the Korean BBQ at Henderson for their Ramen (which was decent for a food court). I did go to my family friend's birthday, she served some BBQed meats and pea dishes which I think were from her home country Ghana.

Decisions, decisions!

What are the reasons behind people's decisions? Decisions that in turn are translated into longterm action or momentary choices. I am in no position to dictate what is the right and wrong as I am not perfect in this decision making department. However, how is it that my decision affects so many people and while yes for the most part, I make them based on what I want (as most people do), my intention is never to cause pain or hurt.

Last weekend, I decided to celebrate my birthday via Caprice with table service. While my intentions were good (by good I mean lots of drinks for everyone), I didn't realize that a lot of people would be too drunk. By too drunk I mean, beyond rational judgement or even act beyond their memorable knowledge. Anyways, decisions exercised that night were fairly poor. A handful of individuals didn't show up some for good reason and others for stupid reasons (which I am still pretty annoyed about), some got wasted before they could even enjoy themselves (which I'm almost grateful for because I think about what more could have possibly happend that night and cringe while I bring out my sledge hammer) and some did stupid unreasonable things while saying things to pretty much ruin any friendship.

It's unfortunate all these decisions were made to lead to this nights' occurance. Could it have been avoided? Maybe? I don't know. All I know is that while it is unfortunate, it is necessary to be able to justify actions and decisions as a process of life. Maybe it was a sign to shake up the norm and force us to re-evaluate and change. Because as entertaining as some actions are, they are hurtful to others. And when those we are closest to get hurt it makes us want to find a way to make things better to avoid those things from happening again.

On a more positive note, my cousin is one of the best cooks ever! She made an amazing Heirloom Tomato and Buffalo Mozzerella Salad, Roasted Artichokes and for my birthday dinner made some yummy Roti with Chicken Curry!

Life is really what you make of it and those that matter, you make decisions for what's good for them and you because they ultimately should be your source of happiness like a yummy tomato and mozzerella salad.

NYC

Alright, well I was postponing a New York blog since I ate and did so much in 5/6 days that I feel like it would be boring for me to dictate, but here it goes (since I took all those photos of my food and it would been a waste of time if I don't do this)!

Day 1: Sushi at East Sapporo on 10th. After being picked up from the airport, where I discovered that there was no storm shower as my iphone had forecasted- I almost melted into a puddle wearing boots, jeans and a hoodie, my aunt drove me to Brooklyn and then to East Sapporo where I met up with an old friend from NYC. I was craving Tuna Tataki but the closest thing I saw to that on the menu was a Tuna Steak to which I said rare-medium but turned out to be entirely cooked! But still quite yummy with some citrusy marinade. My aunt and my friend ordered softshell crab roll and some other one that I didn't really try.

Day 2: For breakfast my other Aunt (with whom I stayed with) took me to a quaint little Filipino restaurant where I had the best Daing (some sort of fried salty-esque fish) with eggs. It was sooo good, each bite brought back so many memories of growing up in the Philippines. It actually made me miss the Philippines even more, or the fact that I don't feel Filipino at all because I'm too lame to remember how to speak Tagalog or I can barely get around on my own there. For lunch, more Filipino-ness, my cousin brought me to Jollibee where the AC was busted so it truly felt like I was in the Philippines. I had their palabok and chicken joy (noodles with egg (?) sauce and fried chicken pretty much. It was yummy except the prices were atleast six times more than it would be in the Philippines!

For dinner I met up with one of my bestest friends from highschool. We went to this really awesome resto in TriBeCa (short for triangle below the canal) called Ninja. Upon entrance we knew it would be a memorable eating experience as the entire reception was decorated with huge dark black boulders to mimic a dungeon or Japan during the middle ages (I'm not very historical but it looked like a dungeon). Anyways, the restaurant was actually in the basement and we were ushered into an elevator to get to the dining floor. What we didn't realize was the surprises to come! Immediately after the elevator opened a waiter dressed as a ninja came out so sleuthly we (those in the elevator) were startled when he made some ninja-esque greeting. The rest of the meal was full of random ninjas throwing (but not really) ninja stars sleuth gate openings etc. I'm sad I can't fully describe this experience in its entirety but it's really something to experience for yourself. I had pan seared tuna with beets, it was different and so yummy, along with chef's special sashimi which floated nicely on a leaf in what looked to be a cauldron! I don't really know type of fish there was except for Tuna I knew was involved.

Day 3: For breakfast my aunt made some Filipino chicken sausages. For lunch, after shopping for a good hour or two at Forever 21 on Union Square we chose to eat something different and stepped into a Mexican Resto on University Blvd. I ordered a seafood fajita mix, since I'm so in love with seafood. It was suuuch a big portion as it came with tortilla wraps, the prawns lettuce peppers and tomatos, rice and beans! I ate it like a salad minus the tortilla, rice and beans as I was already stuffed after eating half the massive plate of prawns. For dinner, I didn't really have much time to eat dinner as I was trying to get home to queens to shower and then run back to manhattan for a friend's birthday at Pulse Karaoke Bar near Times Square. At the Karaoke Bar, he ordered some wings and pigs in blanket (?) appys which were pretty yummy for a karaoke bar or maybe cause I was really hungry.

Day 4: For breakfast my uncle decided to make me pancakes with chocolate syrup and blueberries! It was a nice gesture and was super yummy but I rushed to eat it as I was already late to meet up with my highschool friend. For lunch, after having met up with my friend, we purchased our lunch from Whole Foods in this super fancy building and walked through central park to have a picnic on the lake (which we later rowed a boat through!). For dinner, we went to this Afghan Kebab House on 54th (?) where I had the BEST tandoori prawn kebabs. It was sooo good I'm starting to crave it as I type. This was probably one of the best days of being in New York. I felt like such a New Yorker, picnic in Central Park, going to the Met for a dollar, taking a NYC cab to watch Mary Poppins on Broadway and then taking the train and walking home to Queens where my Aunt left out this cute but deadly little cup of Tiramisu.

Day 5: For breakfast my aunt made me a yummy prawn sandwich spread with pandesal (Filipino bread buns). For lunch, we ate at this Malaysian Resto near the Circle Line Tour dock (where I later went for a nice little boat cruise around Manhattan). Anyways, for lunch I had this yummy tart and sour green mango salad with prawns and then soft shell crab with green mangos. I rarely experienced this tarty crunchy yummy-ness! For dinner, I went to Penang, a fusion of Thai and Malaysian resto in Queens. My aunt ordered the Roti Canai (this pastry/bread esque with curry esque dip) and lots of seafood dishes(which kind of tasted like chinese food).

Day 6: Before leaving I went to a Japanese restaurant where I had mango chicken and pad thai ... I also was confused as to why it was called a Japanese restaurant but I noticed that most things in New York were ethnically diverse or there was a nice fusion between most ethnicities.

Anyways, I ate a crap load when I went to New York as the weighing scale portrayed with my return. I was so at awe and appreciative to my family and friends who took so much time from work to spend time with me. I really did feel absolutely amazing. Despite the short time my freedom (for the most part) was so liberating. It was good to feel independent, to be able to commute and find locations on my own! It was nice to be around people who chose to take the time to be with me =)

Done

Life is short. This message reverberates with each movie, with each song and even more so with a passing of a individual close to us. This past week my sister's friend passed away at the young age of 16. As inevitable as it is, death can be emotional, especially when it occurs at young age in such a tragic circumstance.

While the mood I seem to be painting is dark and gloomy, the message and content of this blog is not (I hope). Not to reiterate, but life is short. I lived this week being wholey (not a word I know) grateful and alive. Grateful for the people that have been such a great and amazing part of my life, the privileges I am able to experience and the simple things I am able to accomplish.

Tuesday with my cousin, I went for facials and got my hair done then splurged on dinner at Coast on Robson and Alberni. I had an amazing smoked salmon flat bread and fresh Atlantic Scallops (which I kinda thought was a bit cold when I got them) with grape tomatos and some strange squash thing that I forgot the name of. Wednesday with one of my good friends, I had yummy home made (by my friend's mom) smoked salmon with sundried tomato & caper pasta, caught some rays, ate decent wings at the Fiddle and watched the Exorcist for the first time.

Thursday with another one of my good friends, I walked down through Commercial and explored through Venables and Clark in search of La Casa Gelato for some Cabernet Sauvignon Sorbetto (yummy and refreshing!). We then ventured to try Harambe's, an Ethiopian restaurant on Commercial which I thought was nicely decorated and although some (maybe most) would find the service lacking, I thought it was nice. It was a very casual and chill atmosphere catering to fellow Ethopians. The food was mostly pickled lentils, chickpeas, spinach and string beans and some spicy curry-esque chicken all of which I really liked (such a change from the seafood). I'm not sure what we ate it with (aside from using our hands) there were rolls of bread(?) the consistency was different, soft, bubbly almost kind of doughy? I've yet to do my research. I liked the new experience though!

And so as the week wraps up, I find myself thinking, what is it that I haven't done that would love to do? I have been choosing to spend time with those I love the most, those who mean so much to me while doing something either out of the ordinary, just relaxing, or endulging in a treat. The people that surround you and the experiences you live through with them are those that matter. While I did hold a bit of a grudge, after the occurance of certain events this week I find it worthless to spend any more time and emotion on the matter.

Friends

It seems now adays with the black white grey and all the colors in-between that some definitions vary. While this is the case for most things, the whole not having a set and specific definition, I'm pretty sure there is one definite underlying quality or word to define the word 'friend'. Friends for me are supposed to be dependable, trustworthy and caring. I have a fair bit of 'friends' on facebook and maybe even in real life I call them 'friends' but are they really a 'friend'?


Lately with my sudden free time I've been given unlimited time to think about where I am in life, people I know and my real friends. Friends take the time out of their day or week to keep in contact with you no matter how busy they are. A mere 'hey, I'm busy this week we'll hang out next week', although quite short, what I see in this message is care. It is enough for me to see that they took the time out of their day to consider me, that they wanted to hang out with me, contact me. I'm not needy. I don't need to be showered with constant attention, I can get along fine being independent and wandering about on my own. But if I am supposed to call you a friend you need to be one.


Friendships have boundaries, mutual understandings. While some people construct these understandings amongst themselves, I prefer to keep my friendships platonic, by platonic I simply mean no overt flirting! Flirting is a definite no-no, I think. I mean, I guess some people are different but I know various friendships ruined by an overboard of flirting. I don't need to be smothered with affection either. And it is also a definite no-no to flirt/ give out your number to your friends ex. It simply is not done, for me anyway.

I thought I'd start this long blog with that since I haven't blogged it up in a while. My New York eating adventures will soon be posted! But lately I have been indulging in ... Vietnamese food. I don't think I can ever get truly tired of it. Yesterday my friend's mom made some really yummy lobster ravioli with tomato sauce, sooo good! I also made my return (finally) to Sango in Suter Brook and tried the Hawaiian Roll! Yummy spicy tuna roll with ahi tuna on top. Also tried Malaysian Orange Ginger chicken wings at the Wings on North Road after watching Knight & Day with some friends, it was a good time!