Stress. It's funny to bring up that word since I've been feeling so amazing and relaxed. I couldn't fathom the idea of being stressed since I just finished post secondary. But here it is, the feeling you get where your brain seems to be gasping for air, when you feel like you have to keep thinking and moving or else you'll fall behind or miss something important, the feeling of panic that deprives you from sleeping ... Well you get it, it's a shitty feeling.
And so, while I'm aware of the alternative sources of stress aside from school or work that I feel merely rattles (this is a euphumistic understatement) your mental periphery and most often will rouse an alternate psycho ego, I have rarely experienced emotional stress. This stress I believe is derived from aspects of your personal lives such as family, friends, money, jobslessness, (sashimi deprivation) and other macroscopic factors that in turn shape your microscopic issues. I guess while I was in school I'd be able to mound all that stress into one pile and label it school/ time stress which I feel would vanish after getting a project/ assignment/exam done.
Now, there's almost a sense of helplessness, I guess depending on the magnitude of your problem, rather your own ability to perk up your optimistic (almost ignorant) perspective.
Yesterday, I had an illegal amount of caffeine via tea, coffee and a questionable juice that I later found to contain a crap load of sugar hence I will now label it equivalent to an energy drink. And while this magnanamous(not a word I know) amount of energy was circulating throughout my system I began thinking and hearing things that would make any person, or so I hope, lose sleep.
While I can't disclose much of this privileged information (since this pertains to 90% of you reading this or know who it would pertain to) I feel as if I need to do something!
Well that was a crap load of massive words that I needed to use as a means of self-gratification, confusion and just plain Maria/marbeeness. Basically I'm stressed and I feel like there's a hole I can't fill :(
...and no it's not cause I'm holding back on sashimi cause I had some today at Sango in Suter Brook along with a Cool Cumber Roll -THE BEST ROLL I've had by far!